Girl: will u marry me........

Sardar: no hum shaadi sirf relatives mein hi karte hain.....

mere mamma ne papa se ki........

bhai ne bhabhi se.........

khala ne khalu se..........

aur mein apni biwi se karunga.........lolzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

di....lolzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

lollllz! good one!

hey plzzzzzzzzz replyyyyyyyy friendssssssss..............????????

Sardarji, tell me ...., what is the meaning of SMS ?

Sardar angrily said, i know -

it means....

S - Sardaron ke

M - Mazak udane ki

S - Service

Shopkeeper: "ISke Saath koi gift nahin hai bhaisaab"

Sard : "Oye ispe likha hai CHOLESTROL FREE!!"

Sardarjee to Sunita: "I want to marry you"
Sunita: "But I am one year elder than you."
Sardarjee: "No Problem, then I will marry you next year."

American says "US mein shaadi E-mail se hoti hai.."
Sardarji " India mein to.. shaadi Fe-mail se hi hoti
hai...!!!"

he sanam guddddddddddd..............

Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.

When I am: Kareeb

There is only: Khamoshi

I want to speak: Dil Se

That's my kind of: Ishq

I want this to be: Gupt

As I always have: Darr

That I will loose you: Sajani

And that would be great: Sadma

I am your: Mr.Aashique

But sometimes bit: Deewana

Tell me: Hum Aapke Hain Kaun

As I feel : Kuch Kuch Hota Hai

In this : Duniya Dilwalon Ki

I told you: Maine Pyar Kiya

May be : Dil To Pagal Hai

Because: Jab Pyar Kisise Hota Hai

The whole world appears as: Dushman

But anyway: Pyar To Hona Hi Tha

Husband asks: "Do u know the meaning of WIFE"??????

"Without Information Fighting Everytime"......................

Wife Replies: no.........it means..............

"With Idiot For Ever..........!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Have you ever wondered what would be in "Titanic" if the same was made
     in Bollywood?

     The name of the movie would be "Goa to Bombay". Well here it goes!

     * Madhuri has to be Rose and who else but Shahrukh as JJJJJ JJJ
     Jack.Madhuri's fiance would be Gulshan Grover who mutters "bad man"
     everytime he sees Shahrukh.

     * Amitabh Bacchan would make a guest appearance as the Ship's captain
     and would be waltzing with Madhuri during the party. Of course, he would
     not
     die.

     * Shahrukh will be travelling with his sister and 5 other chamchas from
     college plus 50 extras who are well trained with every dance sequence in
     the world.

     * The movie would only last for 7 hours. Thanks to great piece of
     editing,there would be only 22 songs in the movie out of 30 in CD album.

     * The ship would be overflowing with extras whom you normally find in
     movies that have a court scene full of people or a slum full of aam-janta.
     The ship will start sinking, not because of the iceberg but because of
     excessive on-board population.

     * The infamous lovemaking in the back seat of the car would be replaced
     with
     a song in the Swiss Alps.

     * Best friend of Shahrukh will save his sister from being raped during
     chaos.The sister will instantly fall in love right after this and she will
     also get a song or two.

     * Remember Rose changing her mind about jumping into the water? In our
     case,Madhuri changes her mind, since...since... the ship is moving along a
     creek and the water stinks!

     * How can we forget the painting scene? Shahrukh would be painting
     Madhuri's portrait with Madhuri fully covered minus the locket (Censors
     yaar!).
        This is to be followed by a dance number, with extras of course, in a
     art
     gallery.

     * Shahrukh would eventually find his long lost mom Aasoo Devi on the
     ship.Only during the climax would Aasoo Devi tell Shahrukh about how
     Gulshan troubled them. Shahrukh would then yell, "Kutte mein tera khoon
     peejaaoonga". The ensuing fight would only last for an hour.

     * There would be an antakshari for the "drowners" conducted by Annu
     Kapoor instead of the trio playing the violin.

     * Most important!! The number of times the word "Bachaoooo"
     would be yelled would be a record in the history of cinema.And the
     masterpiece would be waste of time...ooops waste of money without...

     * "Raaaabert...Captain se ja ke kaho ke agar apni maa or bahen ko zinda
     dekhnachahte ho to naav ko Hindustaan kee sarhado se hamesha hamesha ke
     liye bahoootdoor le le."

Before marriage:
Roses are red, sky is blue,
O my darling! I love you…

After Marriage:
Roses are dead,
I have flu,
don’t come near me,
Paray hatt tuu,

GABBAR : yeh haath mujhe de de thakur.............!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THAKUR : Le le kutte,      do haath to tere paas pehle se hi hain,  ab shera wali maa banega kya??????????